It's All About ___?

As a Mommy I have learned a great many things. Some of these lessons have surprised me. Today, as I spent yet another nap-time fighting my children's sin nature in order to get them to get the rest I knew they needed, I realized that I am my children.

My children are a reflection of me, as they learn so much of their behaviors from me, but today I learned that I am them. Let me explain.

I am as testingly stubborn as a 2 year old.
I am as defiantly manipulative as a 4 year old.
And yes, I am as demanding as a 3 month old.

I get my mind set on something, right or wrong and I don't want to change for any amount of rational reasons. I don't care that Allen is being wise and I am foolish, I want to be right, so I will push to the limits of his or my own breaking point, in foolish stubbornness, just because I don't want to admit that perhaps I was wrong.

I am cunning and conniving, as I plot and plan how to get my way. If I___, then perhaps I can___. Sometimes I am conscious of it, but I am ashamed to say that sometimes it comes so naturally that I don't even notice it. For instance, wanting to have my children go to bed early so that I can have some me time. (Are you catching on to the pattern yet?)

And how often I have thought, "I want to eat NOW, not at lunchtime...I want to sleep NOW not at 11pm or midnight when all my children are finally fast asleep...I want to go to the restroom 1st not 3rd or 4th..." or the infamous, "I want a shower NOW, not when it is convenient for everyone else!".

I am just like my children in sooo many ways.

I am SELFISH!


The biggest difference (besides age and assumed amounts of wisdom that come with that age), is Christ. With Christ I choose to be humble and admit my own wrong doing. With Christ I choose to not manipulate my way through the day, but instead make my choices based on what is best for everyone in the grand scheme of things. With Christ I choose to be patient and serve others above myself, even if it means holding my bladder a little longer than I would like, or waiting until the end of the day to shower off the baby spit up. With Christ I choose to love others more than myself.

I pray that through my example and daily direction, that someday my girls will make that choice too! That they will no longer throw fits. No longer get up continuously when it is bedtime. No longer choose sin over obedience.

FATHER,
May I demonstrate obedience to Christ to my girls in such a way that they in turn would obey. May I demonstrate humility in Christ in such a way that they in turn would be humble. May I demonstrate love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control; in such a way that they, in turn, would reflect the fruit of the Spirit. May I be like Christ, so that my girls would choose to be like Him too.

Thank You, FATHER, for loving me, even when I don't choose to be like you. Thank you for always welcoming me back as your prodigal child. Thank you for being the ultimate example to me, of what I ought to be to my children. Thank you, for being my FATHER, and choosing me to be your child.