Between the Smiles There is Silence

Today I found myself staring, for sometime, at the pictures that cover our refrigerator. Pictures of family and friends from various times and places. As I stood there I reflected on the fact that most came to us in a Christmas card, and thought of the blessings each card spoke of, as they recounted the year. Then as I poured over the pictures I couldn't help but think of the things that went untold. The divorces, deaths, and heart wrenching troubles that brought so much pain to the author. Many who experienced these painful times sent no letter to tell of their year, but let the silence speak for itself, as quietly as it may. I began to ponder why it is that Christmas letters have become an art, and not a chance to be true to the realities of life.

People work tirelessly finding just the right way to paint the canvas of their year, and put it in just the right light, so that it looks beautiful to all who behold it. Yes, sometimes within that landscape is the mention of the politically correct ugliness of life, such as physical injuries, job loss and in certain situations death or even divorce. But, even these often get painted with a fine brush, gently stroked over the page, so as to blend nicely with the piece.

I thought longer and realized that one could also go too far the other way. Too much discussion of ones woes could lead to a very ugly and dark work that might lead to self pity and various other sins. Then you would have another piece of art, only this one would be more Gothic in nature and might frighten small children.

We need balance in our telling of the truths of life. We MUST tell of the blessings God has bestowed upon us, but we MUST also require the prayers of our brothers and sisters as to the matters which torment our souls and leave us paralyzed in a heap of a sobbing mess on our knees before the Father. And we should also be willing to share these moments of pain with the unbelieving people in our lives, so that they can see that even through struggles Christ brings us through to the other side in ways one cannot possibly make it through without Him. We need to tell of the pain between the smiles, with more than our silence.

I must admit that I too did not send a card this past Christmas. In part because of being in Washington for a month to visit family, partly because I planned to send a card with the announcement of our new arrival this spring, but if we are being honest, there was also part of me that couldn't bring myself to share my year with you. I struggled to think of how to paint my canvas, and then found myself bouncing between Gothic and Impressionistic. But all of it was kitsch art, because it wasn't my work, but my cliche inability to step away from the norm and tell the truth.

Christmas has come and gone now, but this spring when I send out my letter, I will attempt to find the balance between truth telling and struggle dwelling. I want to share all the amazing blessings of 2008 and the the beginning of 2009, and also ask for your prayers as I (and my family) deal with the struggles of life.

On that note, if you want to receive an announcement/letter please email me your address, and we will be sure to get one to you!